Unofficial Make-a-Baptist-Laugh Day (or Jokin’ About Religion and Drinkin’)

My delightful in-laws are partially responsible for my love of good wine at a decent price. They escorted chaperoned chauffeured me and my husband on dozens of trips to the California Wine Country. The Other Joe is a regular commenter on this little slice of the internets, and the Lovely Sue is actively encouraging my appreciation for a perfectly prepared martini.

Joe, who is decidedly Catholic, is also one of the funniest people I know (intentionally and unintentionally,) and he sent me the following joke. Which made me giggle to fits of coughing. Well played, sir.

So, I’ll share, for your Baptist amusement:

The Baptist Cowboy

A cowboy, who just moved to Wyoming from Texas, walks into a bar and orders three mugs of Bud. He sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more.

The bartender approaches and tells the cowboy, “You know, a mug goes flat after I draw it. It would taste better if you bought one at a time.”

The cowboy replies, “Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in Arizona; the other is in  Colorado. When we all left our home in Texas, we promised that we’d drink this way to remember the days when we drank together. So I’m drinking one beer for each of my brothers and one for myself.”

The bartender admits that this is a nice custom and leaves it there. The cowboy becomes a regular in the bar and always drinks the same way. He orders three mugs and drinks them in turn.

One day, he comes in and only orders two mugs. All the regulars take notice and fall silent. When he comes back to the bar for the second round, the bartender says, “I don’t want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my condolences on your loss.”

The cowboy looks quite puzzled for a moment, then a light dawns in his eyes and he laughs. “Oh, no, everybody’s just fine,” he explains. “It’s just that my wife and I joined the Baptist Church, and I had to quit drinking. Hasn’t affected my brothers though.”

Ok, now it’s your turn! Tell a drinking joke, Baptist or otherwise. Make your friends laugh! Break the demands of polite conversation by talking about religion! Mock the rules! Go!

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11 Responses to Unofficial Make-a-Baptist-Laugh Day (or Jokin’ About Religion and Drinkin’)

  1. J. Wilson says:

    Often run into folks who find it suprising that a presbyterian minister is having a drink; I usually reply, “A presbyterian is a Baptist who likes to drink but can’t afford to be Episcopalian.”

  2. J. Wilson says:

    Nope, sorry, John or Jack but not Jared.

  3. Oh well, Jared Wilson is a pretty well known pastor/author who I know enjoys a good beer. I thought there was a chance, but I would’ve been surprised that he 1) found your blog and 2) didn’t leave a link to his own.

    But anyway John or Jack, your joke was great 🙂

    Knighton you know I am so not funny. I’ll have to go in search of a good one. I live among beer-making baptists though, so it shouldn’t be hard.

  4. Ok I found a good one.

    Q. Why do you have to take two Baptists with you on a fishing trip?
    A. Because if you only take one, he’ll drink all your beer!

  5. Renee says:

    What 3 things doesn’t a Baptist acknowledge?

    1. The Pope as the leader of the church.
    2. Jews as the chosen people.
    3. Each other in the liquor store.

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