Bitch (Spain 2009)

Valentine’s Day is a racket. It was created in 1944 by Hallmark Cards to increase revenue between the critical Christmas and Mother’s Day holiday seasons. Then, in 1980, the diamond companies got on board with the scheme, cementing in our cultural lexicon the horrible pink and red, guilt-inducing holiday we’ve come to know and despise. Today, enterprising individuals have created the Anti-Valentine’s Day celebration where they burn cards and letters and over-priced stuffed teddy bears in an annual bonfire that is second only to England’s Guy Fawkes Night.*

This year, I’m adding fuel to the festival fires by introducing to you, dear reader, Bitch wine. A Spanish Grenache, it’s blood red and angry. And at 14% alcohol, it’s a shock to the system – it’s the perfect celebratory beverage for an anti-V-Day tirade/bonfire. Available at your local purveyor for around $9.

*A totally made-up history of Valentine’s Day. It might be true.

Note: if you’re like me and you get a real kick out of celebrating Valentine’s Day in an off-beat kind of fashion, this wine is a whole lot of fun. My husband and I enjoyed it with a pizza last Friday night, spending the entire time making ridiculous anti-Valentine jokes. Also, we might have been affected by the high alcohol content. Seriously, that 14% hit the back of my throat like a shot of cheap whiskey. It was a real bitch. Hah!

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